I Could Not Sleep Last Night...


I couldn’t sleep last night.

A mixture of the crazy heat (101 degrees and counting in Ojai) some things percolating in my heart, and the upcoming full moon and eclipse that is bringing so much forward for so many of us. This eclipse is a book end in many ways to the eclipse from January 31st and whether you realize it or not, many things that were unearthed during that eclipse are either coming to fruition or to completion with this one.

Somewhat amazingly, a tree that had essentially died in my garden was cut back a few weeks ago (what a metaphor) and suddenly I have a view of the stars and the skies from my garden like I have never seen before. And last night, I lay out under the stars, in the heat, and there was literally this one very vibrant “star” that was so bright that it captured on my I-phone. It was clearly not a star, but for someone who works energetically with the celestial realms, I am amazingly bad at knowing or recognizing anything in the sky beyond the pleiades cluster! I downloaded the Sky Guide (I have no idea why I’ve never done that before!) and of course, that bright reddish feeling star was in fact Mars…


So, I lay out, for hours. And I communed with the night sky, and I remembered what I have remembered at different times in my life: that whatever is going on on the surface, whatever the circumstances, whatever the feelings of loneliness and void and sadness that may live inside us, there is a feeling of wholeness that is ours for the taking. I’ve said it a million times before but I’ve never been clearer on this - it doesn’t matter how much money we do or don’t have in our back account, it doesn’t matter our job or our creative ventures or our relationship status, there is a wholeness in our bellies and our hearts that has nothing to do with circumstance, a wholeness so vast that it cannot be quenched by any of those things, and it normally peeks its head back out into our world during the stillness of starry nights when we are alone and cannot sleep. 

It comes with a remembrance and a feeling that we’re not alone, even when we think we might be, and that the awe that calms and soothes our souls as we stare up into the openness and the seeming void of the night sky is actually the healing balm we have been yearning for and searching for. It’s a sense of being complete in a specific moment, regardless of anything else. The future and the past literally disintegrate in real time and there is just you and You communing together. This is why we came. These are the moments we long for. And the eclipses will often bring them right to our door. Not always with the circumstances that we would like, but always with a sense of yes ness and profound gratitude in our hearts. 


How do we know when we’ve found these moments?
You don’t even need to ask. You already know. 

How do we conjure them?
Stillness is our doorway in.


Starry nights are often our doorway in. And if you’ve ever done a long distance alchemy journey or transmission with me, you know that they are also the doorway in. So my advice for this Friday’s full moon and lunar eclipse that is one of the longest ones we’ve known in a long time? Find a way of being in the stillness. It will answer every question there ever was. And the answer will be right here right now, in this moment, with this feeling of wholeness. It’s truly the only question that is ever being asked. And when you find it, there’ll be a moment of reprieve. A moment of no questions. A moment of gratitude and of, dare I say it, peace.

Bless you. Bless this eclipse period. Bless the remembering of the wholeness that we are that is showing up more and more in real time. This is why the shackles of how we have done society previously are being thrown off. This is the gift of this moment. And from here we get to build whatever it is that lights us up from the inside. But it comes from a very different place. It comes from wholeness. I’ll meet you there. 


Love always,
Nicola XO 


PS // Full Moon + Eclipse Long Distance Energy Tune Up
Friday 1PM. Pacific, in the Temple OF Illumination. 

When we remember that we are already Whole, everything falls into the place. The things that we think we want, the feelings we want to feel, the way we want to experience the world — all come for a desire to remember who we actually are. When we remember that, the things don’t matter quite so much, and when we forget it, the things really don’t matter so much — even when we “get” them. Especially when we get them. What we are actually searching for is WHOLENESS, and amazingly, we cannot get it from the external. For obvious reasons. But even more amazingly, when we dust off our insides, we will discover something next level incredible - like the wizard of Oz reminds us so beautifully, it truly is already here. It was here all along. We have access to it. As humans, we just need a vibrational nudge or two to remember it. 

Join me on Friday for one of these gorgeous vibrational nudges. We’ll harness the power of the full moon and the eclipse to clear the dust and allow the fullness of you in your wholensss to show up in human form. What a gift. What a profound profound gift. 

And the best part? It will shift the way you see the world and as a result, it will shift the way the world sees you. But the best part? You won’t care quite so much, cos you’re already whole. 


How do long distance alchemy/ energy tune ups work? 

Similarly to reiki (although it’s not reiki) Nicola opens portals and star gates and shares vibrational tones for you to receive gentle energy tune ups and support through the ethers. People often report specific tingling in their toes or feelings of energy releasing from their bodies during the transmissions and a feeling of lightness and joy afterwards.

Nicola always reminds us that this isn’t voodoo, she’s not “doing” anything to you without your permission. She is opening access and sharing healing energies and you get to decide as a Soul what you want to access and receive. She provides the energy, you get to play with it. This is how alchemy works. You are a sovereign being and you get to decide what you want to receive energetically and how you want to use it!


Where do I experience this? 

The tune-up transmission will take place live in the temple of illumination at 1pm pacific on Friday July 27th. If you are a member you can experience it with nicola in real time. If you’re not a member, you can join us by becoming a member, or otherwise, for non-members, it will be ready for you in a private portal at 7pm that night. 

You can purchase it as a stand-alone here.


How should I experience  this long distance energy tune up? 

You can sit, lay down, eyes closed, eyes open, go for a walk. Whatever feels good to you. It doesn’t really matter. The alchemy works however you wish you receive it. Trust your intuition as to whether you want to be still or on the move. 

I have been feeling particularly sluggish, emotional, sad during the past few weeks. Is it because of the eclipse? Join the crew! Yup. While the particulars are different for everyone, the signature of an eclipse and eclipse season (we are coming up for number 2 of 3) is that sometimes the rug will be pulled from underneath you, exposing things you have not wanted to see for a while but are ready to be worked, or you will be asked to see old family karmic patterns come to the surface to be healed. You are ready for this. It might not feel like it, but you are. And it would not be happening otherwise. If it feels heinous, just remember that you are supported beyond measure and this is ultimately happening for your growth and ultimate delight and not because of any punishment. We are releasing old vibrational beliefs up the wazzoo and I speak from personal experience when I say it’s a trip. I also speak from personal experience of having gone through this eclipse season consciously for many years that what’s on the other side is pretty golden. What’s on the other side is wholeness. And that is worth its weight in gold. 

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